To Be or Not To Be: Committed

I've always found relationships rather troublesome. How being exclusive with each other elevates expectations to the unreal until what started out beautiful turns ugly. Very ugly.

Here is my 2 cents. Relationships are too much hard work.

Time:
It demands too much of my time and God knows how restless I can get. I can barely make time for self-reflection given my short attention span and hyperactivity. Meeting up is fun as it always ends in mindless sex, but the constant calls and texts is just suffocating. I got loads of work I need to accomplish in my job and it doesn't help if a partner is bugging you to make time for him or his calls or his text. I'm the type of person who texts a person, if it isn't official business once or twice a day. Or three, tops. Good morning, I'm on my way to work.. Take your lunch.. I'm heading home now, I'll call you when I get home.. That's me. Heck, I could go for months without texting my family. Not because I forgot them. or doesn't love them. I'm just really busy. And the constant need to be together? Wtf?! We have lives apart from each other. You have friends. I have mind. You have work, so do I. You have your family, and I do too. You have you, I have me.

Energy:
Partners tire me out. The constant demand for text messages (please read above), calls (above), wall post especially dedicated for them. The arguments when one forgets special dates like monthsaries, birthdays, first movie, dental appointments. Who can keep track of all of those. I even forget my birthday sometimes. And it is so exhausting patching things up after a fight. And since, I'm mostly the reason for the argument, or so he says, I have to do the panunuyo. It is tiring. Geez

Maturity:
I really do have a problem with maturity or other people's maturity. I don't understand why partners would make such a  big deal of everything? People aren't perfect. People forget. People get exhausted. Not all people are fond of texting, or facebook. Why make a fuss of everything? Why not try to understand? Be the bigger person. I've been in semi-relationship with older guys, who I imagined would be more mature, more understanding, but turns out to be totally the opposite. I guess people these age usually demand more in relationships as they become more attached to the ideals of relationships.

Don't get me wrong. Not that I don't make anyeffort. Not that I goof around with every dick I come across with. I can say I'm faithful. When I date a guy, I date exclusively. Maybe no commitment but I practice monogamy nevertheless. All this fuss, I just don't understand. I can love a person, the only way I know. And I need someone who understands that.

Or maybe I've found him. But just let him go.

Tabula Rasa

I'm starting a new blog. Unfortunately, my other blog is too straight for comfort. Haha.

Here goes my introduction:

I'm ***. 24. Currently out of a job right now but damn well enjoying it.
I'm a closet case. Out to a few friends. Too few.

So in desperate need for an outlet for my gay-ness, thus this blog.

I'm gay. Discreet. But gay anyway.